When I Am an Old Woman

I did some midnight shopping tonight. I used to do that, years ago, when Linnea was small. I tell you--it was so relaxing...
I needed just a few things, and so I went.
By myself.
By.
My.
Self.

No thoughts about whether the kids were fighting in the van while waiting for me.
No crying baby wanting to be nursed, or just to be out of her carseat.
No fighting over who's turn it is to come into the store with Mom.
No crowded store--it was 11:30 pm! In fact, I was a little surprised at how many people I did see.

I think I am on to something here.
I don't know how I could have forgotten how pleasant it is to shop so late at night.

However, I realized something on the (silent) drive home, alone with my (silent) thoughts:

I am an old woman.

Here's why:

• I don't like to drive at night.
• I can't hear people very well on the phone; and in conversations, I find myself needing to watch the speaker's lips in order to "hear" them better.
• I think all music is "too loud."
• I don't even know what an MP3 player is, much less own one.
• Diddo that for an iPod.
• I have come to have such a disdain for packaged things. I think to myself, "well, I could certainly make that for a lot less than the price they have on that!"
• I call everyone "honey". (I am not from the South, either.) As in, "What was that, honey?" when I didn't hear what they said. It's probably because I respond to my children that way--and I have so many children that I have said that phrase as often in my 30 years as some 75 year olds have.
• I announce when I have to use the bathroom. Not loudly, mind you. Just in a matter-of-fact way, as if everyone at the table would be completely dumbfounded when I had left the room had I not told them "I need to use the bathroom."
• I love the color purple.
  
• Lastly, caffeine affects me so much. I had a Dr. Pepper on the way home. And now I am wide awake. And it's nearly 2 am.
  

So I had best get off the computer and into my bed.
Oh--and I need to use the bathroom.