Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Bragging Rights

In honor of our blizzard today

Cold weather behavior:
60 degrees above zero: Floridians turn on the heat. Minnesotans plant gardens.
50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People are sunbathing in Duluth.
40 above zero: Import cars won't start. Minnesotans drive with the sunroof open.
32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in Bemidji gets thicker.
20 above zero: New Mexicans don long johns, parkas and wool hats & mittens. Minnesotans throw on a flannel shirt.
15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn on the heat. People in Minnesota have one last cookout before it gets cold.
Zero: People in Miami all die. Minnesotans close the windows.
10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. Minnesotans dig their winter coats out of storage.
25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. Girl Scouts in Minnesota still selling cookies door to door.
40 below zero: Washington, D.C. finally runs out of hot air. People in Minnesota let their dogs sleep indoors.
100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Minnesotans get upset because the minivan won't start.
460 below zero (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale): All atomic motion stops. People in Minnesota can be heard to say, "Cold enough for ya?"
500 below zero: Hell freezes over. Minnesota schools open 2 hours late.

{to those who have followed the recent posts/comments, this last one is in NO WAY intended as a jab at public schools. I promise.
This is just copied from an email I received somewhere along the way.}


  1. It does take a lot to clse schools in MN, especially in the bigger towns. I was surprised that the district made the decision so early yesterday to close today. I figured it would be late evening or even this morning before it became official.

    Thanks for the entertainment to help pass the day!


  2. I hear ya on this post, sister... good ole MN!
    Thanks for stopping by my blog!


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